What I Was Made For
Written by Jay — Illinois, USA
I’ll be the first to say that simply living life in a Christ-like way is a practice of Christianity in and of itself. I think that outwardly embodying Christian teachings is a religious practice. Doing something because of our love for God and His creation is a religious practice. The simple act of loving people as God loves us is a religious practice. This practice of loving others as I love myself is what gives me the most joy and fulfillment in my life—not of religious acts alone, but rather of all acts across all facets of my life.
For the beginning of my life, I was largely raised by my grandfather who, before passing, made sure to instill one core doctrine into me: “If you feel down, quit thinking about yourself and help pick someone else up.” For years I wrestled with understanding why it worked so well, but I think I’ve cracked it. God never created humans for solitude. I Corinthians 12:25 says that we are to care for one another. It says that when one suffers, we all suffer and when one rejoices, we all rejoice. God made us to love and to serve our neighbors, so it is no wonder that I get such great joy from helping others. That’s what I was made for.
One of the most powerful moments in my life—when I felt the Lord’s love bestowed on me in a way it seldom had before—is when I came out to my mother. She told me: “You are my child all the same, just as you are God’s child. God wouldn’t create you to love women and then turn his back on you for it.” She told me that God doesn’t make mistakes and hearing that was the beginning of a beautiful journey. One where I was able to heal and believe that I wasn’t just some cosmic screw-up. All because I was outwardly loved. That love is something that I try to embody in all of my endeavors. I want it to bring others the same sense of belonging that I was able to find after such love was shown to me.
Through spending years going through mental health services, largely in group settings, I very frequently interacted with people struggling to feel loved. I thought that maybe being put in those situations may have been God’s way of giving others a peer that they could count on to show them the love they needed. There are sessions where you can see something start to change in a person, where someone starts to believe that they are worth fighting for, or that they are loved, or that they deserve to treat themselves better. Those moments are nothing short of holy.
Beyond that, I’ve also spent over 100 hours as a volunteer tutor simply because helping students gives me joy. I absolutely love watching them succeed knowing that I was able to play even a small part in their growth. Seeing someone light up with newfound belief in themselves—that is when I know I am living out my God-given purpose.
Nothing will ever fill my soul quite like making others happy does. Nothing will ever give me pride like seeing others’ successes. It keeps me humble and reminds me that the world is bigger than my struggles. I hope to spend my life living out and spreading my Papa’s words. I want to be remembered as the person that picked others up before picking myself up, just as Christ did. Because that’s what God made me for.
